Happiness ; a personal thoughts

Gaurav Nepal (DAMU)

There are decisions – some large and some small - which we make daily and any one of them can affect the rest of our lives. That may sound dramatic, so let me explain what I’m thinking.

We have resources available to us, such as time, money and abilities, and the way we use them can influence our future. For instance, if I sit and do nothing I’ll waste my time; if I spend more money than I have, I’ll have financial problems; and if I don’t use a skill I have, I may lose it. On the other hand, if I plan my days immersing myself in interesting and useful activities, I’ll feel fulfilled; if I live within my means and am comfortable spending my money, I’ll sleep soundly at night; and if I use my skills in a meaningful way, I’ll feel satisfied. Easy!

However, finding a balance can be a juggling act. Some people are extremely active and complain that they’re always short of time. In my working life I learnt, and subsequently taught, ‘time management’. I still use those principles today – setting priorities and allotting time; completing tasks so that they don’t dwell on my mind, and not wasting time doing things that don’t matter.

Money, in particular, needs to be balanced. As we go through our working lives, income streams pay for our outgoings, although it’s easy to overspend and let credit-card bills mount up, and for us to have difficulties paying them off. When we retire, our income maybe more limited and also, possibly, our needs. We may, though, decide to spend our savings in ways that we couldn’t previously – such as exotic holidays, expensive cars or comfortable homes. There are decisions to make – do we want to spend our savings or keep them for our old age? 

Our abilities, and how we use them, can affect our wellbeing, although age may dictate how much time we have to develop them. When we’re working and have a young family, our time and money may be restricted and prevent us from taking part in all the activities that we’d like to be involved in. How wonderful to then be retired and enjoy our time, immersing ourselves in various interests and skills, whether it’s something learnt at work or as a hobby.

It’s obviously preferable to balance our income with our desire for more possessions or experiences, and how we do that is very individual. I heard of a man who, having lost his job and with a small amount of money available, got on his bike to travel around the world. Personal discomforts were outweighed by the pleasures he experienced. Another person, with more money, bought a luxury car; something he’d dreamt about for years. If the first had bought the car instead of a bike, he’d obviously have had a problem. As it is, both are happy – and maybe that’s the litmus test, finding happiness.

So, when you decide to do something today, why not relish it and be aware that you’re balancing that decision with the resources you have available. Thomas Merton, a 20th century American author, summed it up perfectly –“Happiness is not a matter of intensity, but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony”.